Welcome All! I'm a dreamer, I hope you are too! A Posse ad Esse, or From possibility to reality, is a general state of mind. I hope you'll share your possibilities with me as I will with you. Namaste~

November 1, 2007

We're Halloweirdos

I guess my wife and I are a little weird. We actually walked around last night with our children to share in the Halloween tradition; we’re Halloweirdos. I like to justify this to my kids by saying that since I will be "stealing" half of their candy, I should at least do some walking too right? But really, it's just something that my wife and I like to do. We figure that soon enough, our kids will be of an age when they either won't be trick or treating, or that they will be old enough to not want us tagging along so we want to take advantage of this time while we can. Why do we have kids after all? I know sometimes they come before we are ready for them, or should I say before we think we are ready for them; but generally speaking, why do we have them? Are we just doing our part to propagate the species? Is it a social requirement that would make us seem to be bad people if we didn't? What is it? More and more often of late I get the impression that these are becoming the reasons more so than they should be. Of course we need to propagate the species, and yes, it is a bit of a social norm, but more than that it is a responsibility and a blessing to have the safety, happiness and development of another life entrusted to us. Last night I was noting how odd it was that there were so few parents that were out doing the walk with their kids, and of that small number of parents, we were the only ones out in force. By that I mean that we were the only family with two parents that I saw in two and a half hours of walking around the neighborhood. Add to that the fact that of the kids that my children play with regularly, three out of three sets of parents didn't go out with their kids. One boy didn't get to go at all because his parents went to Wendover, (for out-of staters, that's the first town in NV, about 1.5 hr away, with casinos.) and left him with his uncle. Another family had their two boys go with us, and yet another let their boys go alone, something I just can't see doing with the current populous of bad guys out there.

This whole issue of participation is merely part and parcel of a much larger issue that I have, one of letting our kids be kids, and caring for them as such. There was a man last night yelling at his older daughter to hold his younger daughters hand while she walked down the stairs from a house. Couldn’t he be holding her hand? Isn’t he the parent? What about all the parents letting their 8, 9, 10 yr old kids run around town alone because “They have a cell phone.” I’m sure the kidnapper will let them get a call off while he’s hauling them into his car. These are kids. Our oldest is not responsible for our youngest, we are. A cell phone is not our kids steward, we are. We’re a little paranoid I’m sure, and we’ve been called overprotective many times; I can live with it. If my children’s biggest issue with me when they are grown and on their own is that I was present too often or protected them too much then so be it. There are too many things in the world that we can’t protect them from; school bullies, peer pressure, bad decisions. We need to protect them from all the things that we can. Take time at least once a week to play a game together, watch a TV show together and talk about things or tuck them in and let them know you love them and for Pete’s sake people participate in their childhood. They’ll remember you walking around on Halloween with them long after the candy has been eaten. They’ll be grown and won’t “need” you before you know it.


Hope you all had a great Halloween, we did!





farm mom said...

Love this post! And agree wholeheartedly!!

Phelan said...

Agree! Yesterday I did a post on celbratory neighborhoods and the lack of them. Both my husband and I went with our children.

A in Temecula said...

Glad you guys had a good time. R, myself, his mom and Aunt all went with the kids...Guess we went a little crazy...It was fun watching them run to every house. From looking at pics, my daughter looks like she celebrated the wrong holiday(Easter). Oh well, her costume, her choice.

RedStateGreen said...

We had a good time. My husband went with the boys, then they went again with my daughter (16) when her and her boyfriend got in from a Halloween movie night they were helping with at the public library. I held down the fort with the hordes of tiny creatures coming to the door. :)

We love being with our kids. It makes me sad when people say they wish their children were gone, especially when they say it in front of them. Ouch.

P~ said...

RSG~ I hate that too. I had a new co-worker a couple of years back that we had over for dinner to kind of extend the hand of friendship you know. He literally refered to his kids as "little bastards". I was so shocked I didn't know what to say. Needless to say that was the only time I willingly socialized with him out of the office. It's sad. Thanks for the comments. Good to hear from you.